The Prank War Of The BAU
by Eminnis
Summary: Reid is bored. He finds a list of things to do when you're bored...and he tries it....and Prentiss finds it too...and the team is starting to lose all patience with them...only trouble can come of this. Humor fic. Please read and review!
1. Would You Like Fries With That?

**So this is off one of the lists of 'things to do' in my profile. I'm into Criminal Minds lately, and I think it's nice to have some light-heartedness. Let me know what you all think! And this is after Gideon and Elle have left. Other than that not really a time line…I suppose after season 2. Really quick, I don't know for sure what J.J's first name is…something Jareau…some help?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters you recognize! And I don't own Burger King. This stands for the entire story.**

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**Chapter One: Would You Like Fries With That?**

Dr. Spencer Reid was bored. Really bored. The team had just finished up another case, and crime was actually slow for once. There was nothing to do. Not even paperwork. Well, there was a little, but Reid didn't want to deal with it right now. He wanted to do something fun…but what?

'Hmm,' he thought. He quickly got up and went to the nearest free computer. He typed into the engine search: Things to Do When You're Bored. A list soon popped up.

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down.  
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.  
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.  
4. Put a garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"  
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone is over their Caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.  
6. Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance to the Prophecy".  
7. Don't use any punctuation.  
8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.  
9. Specify that your drive thru order is "To Go"  
10. Sing Along at the Opera  
11. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.  
12. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.  
13. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I WON I WON!!"  
14. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!!"  
15. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."  
16. Send this to your friends to make them smile, it's called therapy.

'Hmm, this could work for me.' Reid thought. He deserved to have a little fun. Hotch wouldn't be pleased, but hey, Reid was still young. He was the youngest member of the team. He wanted a break from all the depressing seriousness.

Reid looked at the list again. Number three looked good. Reid quickly printed out the list and then hurriedly exited out of the screen.

"Reid!" Derek Morgan called out. Reid turned and looked at him questioningly.

"Can you grab some more paper while you're over there?"

Reid grinned. Time to start.

"Sure, Morgan, would you like fries with that?"

Morgan was taken aback. What in the world was Reid talking about?

"Um…no thanks. Just the paper." Morgan replied warily. He wondered vaguely if Reid was on drugs or something. He sure hoped not.

"Ok! Be right there!"

Morgan turned and went back to his desk. A few minutes later Reid came and handed Morgan the paper.

"Thanks, man." Morgan said as he took the sheets.

"Welcome!" Reid replied cheerfully.

Reid left and sat down at his desk. This was amusing, and he'd continue with it, but he needed something else to do as well. He thought back to the list. He took it out and looked again. Hmm…one looked good too.

"Hey, Morgan? I'm gonna run home to get something. Then I'm gonna go on lunch break. Can you tell Hotch so he won't freak out on me?" Reid asked.

"Sure." Morgan called back.

Reid quickly ran out to his car. He drove swiftly over to the nearest store and bought a cheap hairdryer. 'I must be really bored to do this,' the young genius thought as he returned to his car.

He drove over to a Burger King and quickly bought lunch. He then parked his car in a nearby parking lot just outside of a supermarket.

Feeling slightly immature, but amused, Reid found the pair of sunglasses in his glove box and slipped them on. He then grabbed his newly bought hairdryer and wound the cord around the handle so it wouldn't drag.

The hairdryer almost resembled a gun. It was black, and also kind of skinny. Reid adapted a 'serious' look on his face and got ready to start the prank as a red car approached him.

Reid pointed the hairdryer at the car and to his strange delight, it did slow down. The person in the car looked at Reid strangely, almost fearfully.

"Watch it," Reid said in a serious voice. "the speed limit here is very slow. Don't go any faster or I'll have to report you."

"Uh, yes sir…" the young woman who was driving replied nervously. Was this some dude out of the mental institute?

"Go on now." Reid ordered. The car quickly drove away.

Reid re-did this trick with several more passing cars. His lunch break was nearly ended, and he decided to hit one more car before he left. The car was aqua colored. Reid pointed the hairdryer at the car and it slowed. Reid was about to deliver his speech when he saw exactly _who _was in the car. It was Emily Prentiss. She was looking at Reid nervously.

"Hey, Reid, what are you doing?" Prentiss asked. She wasn't sure if she wanted to know.

"Um…I'm pointing a hairdryer at passing cars to get them to slow down…" Reid replied. He was embarrassed. It was fun to do this, but now one of his co-workers had caught him at it.

"That's clear…but why are you?" Prentiss persisted.

"I was…bored?" Reid replied slowly.

"O-okay. Reid, can you just…please head back to work and…stop scaring people? I was called in here as report of someone terrorizing the place…with a gun. They knew the FBI was closest, so they called me in. Just…go back to work ok?" Prentiss was still very confused.

"Ok." Reid agreed. Then remembering his earlier prank, he added on, "Would you like fries with that?"

Prentiss shook her head and drove back to work. Reid followed her. He was laughing the whole way.

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**So I didn't edit this as much as I usually like, but I think it's okay. I am currently willing to get a beta for this story, that way I don't miss as many things. Also I've tried to keep the characters in character...let me know how I did. Please review!**

**Eminnis and Alicia**


	2. no punctuation

**Here's the second chapter! Also, I have a Ciminal Minds Poll up in my profile. Just a 'who is your favorite character.' Feel free to check it out! Thank you to all my reviewers! I have decided I'm going to list all of them at the end of the story instead of by chapter. Just makes it easier. Thank you again!**

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**chapter two no punctuation**

Prentiss walked into Hotch's office.

"Prentiss, what was wrong?" Hotch asked.

"Um…it was Reid. He was sitting in the parking lot of a supermarket with sunglasses on. He also had a slim black hairdryer. He was pointing it at cars to make them slow down. it was…odd." Prentiss replied.

Hotch shook his head. "I'll go deal with him."

"No," Prentiss protested. "He's just having a bit of fun, my guess. It really wasn't hurting anything. A bit odd, but it didn't hurt anyone."

Hotch thought for a moment. "Alright," he finally consented. "But you're taking care of any more calls like that Prentiss."

"Yes sir." Prentiss agreed.

Hotch left for his lunch break and Prentiss returned to her desk.

"Reid," Jennifer Jareau called as she walked over to the young genius's desk. "Can you please go pick up the mail?"

Reid grinned a boyish grin and replied, "Of course, J.J. Would you like fries with that?"

J.J. looked shocked for a moment. Before she could respond, Morgan interceded.

"Reid, what is with that?! It's really getting irritating!"

"Morgan, lighten up. He's just playing around." Prentiss defended. Morgan huffed and sat back down at his desk. Reid flashed Prentiss a grin and then left to get the mail and J.J. went back to her desk.

Prentiss tried to settle down and work again, but she was bored. She soon found herself wandering over to Reid's desk. The pranks he pulled had to be from a list. And that list had to be around here somewhere. She looked around and confirmed that Morgan and J.J. were both engrossed in their work and Rossi was still out for lunch.

Quickly, Prentiss started to shift through Reid's papers. Where was it…there it was! Ha! She glanced through the list quickly…hmm…use no grammar…that would be fun.

Prentiss covered the paper up and replaced everything the way it was. she smirked as Reid returned and gave the mail to J.J.

Half an hour later Rossi and Hotch were back and working.

"Prentiss," Rossi said. "How's the paperwork coming?"

"its coming great sir everything is going smoothly." Prentiss replied, using zero punctuation and going into mono-tone.

Rossi didn't miss the pause, or lack thereof, of breath.

"Prentiss, something wrong? You seemed kind of rushed."

"no of course not i am fine nothing wrong here all good." She replied.

Rossi looked at her suspiciously. Prentiss smiled back angelically. Rossi shrugged and left.

"Hey, Prentiss?" Reid called. "Come here for a minute please."

Prentiss walked briskly to Reid's desk and he pulled her aside down the hall. He dropped into an empty interrogation room and turned his gaze on Prentiss.

"You snooped through my stuff. You found the list." Reid stated, no question in his voice.

"So?" Prentiss challenged, losing her mono-tone voice and lack of punctuation.

"I don't really care about the list…but I do care about you going through my stuff. Don't do it again." Reid ordered.

Prentiss nodded, looking properly abashed. Reid smiled, his mood suddenly lighter.

"Now. You're doing the one with no punctuation right? How's it going?"

Prentiss grinned back.

"So far so good. But I haven't had much time to see its affects. Though I think Rossi noticed something. Hotch definitely will. He's going to be extremely put out with us when he finds out we're joking around like this. Mr. Serious…" Prentiss trailed off and Reid laughed.

"Yah….he's really uptight sometimes huh?"

"Definitely."

They shared a laugh and then left the room to continue their mischief.

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***laughs* Somehow I just think that Reid trying to order someone to do something is comical. Can you all see it? Please review!**

**Eminnis and Alicia**


	3. Skip, Skip, Skip To My Lou

**I'm sorry it's been so long, but I hope to get chapters out sooner. Ya know why? SCHOOL'S OUT! So this is what I'm celebrating now! Hope you all like and thank you to all my reviewers!**

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**Chapter Three: Skip, Skip, Skip To My Lou!**

Prentiss and Reid looked over the list carefully. What were they going to do now? Prentiss looked closely at the list, trying to see which ones were doable. Finally she spotted one. Number eight: As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

Prentiss could handle that one.

"Reid, look! Number eight!" Prentiss exclaimed excitedly.

Reid looked at it quickly. Then a wide grin stretched over his face.

"Excellent. You do that and I'll think of something else to do." Reid directed.

Prentiss nodded and skipped off. Literally. She was already skipping. Reid shook his head and laughed quietly. Oh boy…

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

Prentiss skipped out into the bullpen. Morgan stopped and stared.

"Prentiss…why are you skipping?" he asked.

"oh no reason at all just felt like it" Prentiss replied tonelessly.

Morgan sighed. "What is with you and Reid today? You both have been acting really weird." Morgan said sharply.

Prentiss balked for a moment. She hadn't expected Morgan to get mad so quickly.

"well we obviously have our reasons what's got your-" Prentiss broke off at Morgan's glare. She smirked and skipped away.

"Prentiss," JJ called over to the skipping agent. "Can you drop these reports off to Hotch?"

"sure" Prentiss replied. She skipped over to JJ and then skipped all the way up to Hotch's office.

"sir JJ wanted me to give you these reports" Prentiss said.

Hotch nodded and took them, looking at Prentiss strangely as she skipped out.

Prentiss was laughing silently at the look on Hotch's face when he realized she was acting weird too. She had her head down and didn't see the intern coming with a tray of fresh donuts and coffee. With a loud bang, she slammed into the poor guy.

"Hey!" the intern protested, getting up and brushing himself off. "You made me drop my load!"

"oh I'm so sorry I didn't mean to are you alright"

"What's wrong with you?"

"nothing are you alright"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm probably fired, but I'm fine."

Prentiss looked thoughtful. "who's your boss"

"Agent Rossi. He hired me to give this stuff to…his team I think."

"i am part of the team don't worry i will explain everything to him you will not be fired good bye"

She was just leaving the intern when Rossi showed up.

"Max!" he shouted. "What the heck did you do?"

Max quivered as he looked up at his angry boss.

"I'm sorry, Agent…whoever just slammed into me. She was skipping. She said she'd take care of it…" Max stuttered out.

"rossi it was my fault i am sorry i will pay" Prentiss cut in.

"No need, Prentiss. What is with you and the monotone?"

"just feel like it i guess"

"Well stop," Hotch ordered from the stairs. "It's getting irritating. And quit skipping as well. What is with you and Reid today?"

"That's what I asked." Morgan commented.

"Oh shut up!" Prentiss snapped, finally slipping out of no punctuation mode. Reid just entered as Prentiss said that and Morgan turned to look at him.

"Don't you think it's a bit odd that Prentiss has been skipping?" Morgan asked.

Reid looked thoughtful. "No, I'm sure she has a very good reason. Besides, it's good to skip, it strengthens your legs, In Accordance to the Prophecy."

Morgan groaned and Reid and Prentiss exchanged smirks. The team was in for serious trouble.

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**Well hope you liked! Please review and I'll get the next one out sooner...hopefully. You're allowed to PM me and bug me if I go past a month!**

**Eminnis and Alicia**


	4. Agent Reid, Report To The Briefing Room

**Hey all! It's been AGES! What, two months I think? I am so sorry for keeping you all waiting so long. But at last here is chapter four! Hope you like it! Please review!**

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**Chapter Four: Agent Reid, Please Report To The Briefing Room**

For the rest of the day, Prentiss and Reid continued their constant bothering of their fellow team mates.

"Reid! Come here please!" JJ requested. Reid walked over to her and looked at her expectantly.

"Did Agent Penn hand in his paperwork yet?" JJ asked. She winced as she waited for Reid's answer. She knew exactly what was coming.

"No, but he will. In Accordance to the Prophecy." Reid smirked at the exasperated look on JJ's face.

"Thanks Reid." With a huff JJ turned around and walked back to her office. How much longer was this going to last? Days? Years? Oh lord please, not years. JJ would have to quit before that happened.

Reid turned back to his desk with a smirk on his face. They had no idea as to what was about to happen. Reid waited until everyone had left the bullpen for various reasons before slipping silently down the hall.

Prentiss was skipping cheerfully down the hall when the intercom suddenly went on.

She stopped for a moment and waited as the static sounded. Confused, she started to head back to the bullpen. Just as she was getting back a throat was cleared.

"Agent Reid, please report to the briefing room. Agent Reid please report to the briefing room."

Then it shut off. Prentiss couldn't help it, she collapsed into giggles.

The person who had called over the intercom for Agent Reid, was Agent Reid himself. She turned to find Reid jogging down the hall from the office and slow to a walk as he entered the bullpen. He painted a confused look on his face and Prentiss had to stifle a giggle.

"That sounded a lot like Reid…" Morgan commented as he entered the bullpen with JJ.

"Hey guys!" Reid called. "Why am I the only one that was called to the briefing room?"

"Gosh, I don't know Reid, why don't you tell us?"

Prentiss clapped a hand over her mouth and whirled to see an angry Hotch glaring at them, Strauss right behind him.

"Um, hi Sir, Ma'am." Reid said nervously.

"Agent Reid, I believe you told me that Agent Hotchner was going into anaphylactic shock? Would you like to explain why he's alright?"

"Um…"

"And just what was I allergic to, Reid?" Hotch asked.

"Uh…coffee?"

"Why do I have a cup every morning then?"

"Uh…"

"Agent Reid." Strauss broke in. "I do not appreciate you acting this way. You are a fully grown man and should not be acting this immaturely. Now straighten up, or you're suspended."

"Yes ma'am." Reid bowed his head in shame and Hotch and Strauss turned and left.

Prentiss approached Reid and smirked.

"That was funny, Reid." She murmured.

"No it was not! You're going to get yourself suspended!" Morgan exclaimed.

"Gosh Morgan, just lighten up!" Prentiss snapped.

"Why are you all defensive?" Morgan demanded.

"Guys, enough. I'm getting a head ache!" JJ complained.

"Yeah Morgan, just relax." Garcia said as she entered the room.

Morgan huffed but turned away.

"Sorry about that Reid I don't know what's wrong with him. Normally he'd find that hilarious. Strange…" Garcia murmured.

Reid shrugged. "Maybe he's just having a bad day."

The team nodded and went back to work.

Meanwhile, Agent Prentiss was thinking she needed to withdraw some cash from the ATM soon…

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**Hmm...so foreshadowing huh? LOL. Thanks for reading and please review! I'll try to get the next chapter up sooner.**

**Eminnis**


	5. Author's Note! EXTREMELY IMPORTANT!

**Oh my gosh everyone. I am so sorry! My computer got a huge virus, and I have no idea of all my stuff will still be alive after everything. I do know that I probably won't be able to be on my computer writing for about a week. I might have some items saved, and anything I do I promise I will update. The virus I have has completely shut down my computer. We tried running a scan and it shut down after a few seconds. In other words I'm sunk. I'll do my best.**

**Eminnis**


	6. Author's Note UPDATE ABOUT UPDATES READ!

**Alright everyone, good news and bad news! **

**Good News: I have got a computer. Had to get a new one.**

**Bad News: Some stories will be updated, some not.**

**If your story is in the following list, feel free to dance around and rejoice! LOL.**

Love Lost

The Prank War of the BAU

Shelter and Protect

To Be A Mother

**Those I am 99% sure will be updated within a week. Very soon for sure. If the story you read is not on this list, that means that sadly, I have zero inspiration for that story. I'd love some reviews of ideas. Hope to see you all within a week! Just now uploaded all my stuff again!**

**Eminnis**


	7. Celebrate Good Times!

**Okay! No, I haven't forgotten this story. Here's the next chapter, let me know how it is! Sorry for those of you that knew I had it done ages ago but didn't update I went camping too with no internet or cell service...*hides behind Morgan, Rossi, and Hotch***

**Reid: What about me? I don't get to be a shield!**

**Me: Well...you're kinda skinny and they could actually protect me and...**

**Reid: *is insulted***

**Me: Aww...you'll get over it.**

**Rossi: Right. I'm posting this.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the song, I'm not sure who does, but I don't.**

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**Chapter Five: Celebrate Good Times!**

Prentiss knew exactly what she wanted to do. But how to go about it…it was simple of course, and luckily there were a few ATM machines in the building so, but she wanted to put her own twist on it. Shouting 'I won I won' is great, but what could she do to personalize it?

Then she knew. A wide grin made its way across Prentiss's face. When it came time for her lunch break, she slipped away silently to go 'eat'.

Prentiss made her way to the front lobby. It was where the machines were and by this time plenty of people would be present.

As Prentiss had predicted, the lobby was very full. Prentiss walked over to the ATM machine and quickly put in her number. She decided to withdraw a couple 20s and waited as the machine processed her request.

A few minutes later, two 20s slid out of the slot.

Prentiss took a breath. It was now or never. She looked around before shouting at the top of her lungs:

"I WON, I WON! OH MY GOSH I WON!"

Several people dropped what they were doing and whirled around to stare at the dark haired woman screaming and dancing around the ATM machine.

"Is she crazy?" murmured one agent to his friend.

"Think it's time to call the people in white…" his friend muttered back. They both smirked and watched the scene unfold.

By the door Rossi stood with a look of shock on his face. That couldn't be Prentiss…could it? It certainly looked like it…had the job gotten to her? Was she going insane? It was a dang ATM it was supposed to give out money!

Then Rossi thought back to the strange happenings of today and groaned. This must be part of it all. Oh lord, Strauss and Hotch would be _ticked_!

Just then Strauss stormed through the door, pushing Rossi roughly out of the way.

_Speak of the devil…_Rossi thought. He saw Strauss march straight up to Prentiss but then abruptly stop. He could see why. Prentiss was…dancing and…singing…

(Just after Rossi sees Strauss)

Prentiss, oblivious to the danger fast approaching, smiled as she launched the final phase of her little joke. She stopped, cleared her throat, and sang in a high pitched voice.

"Celebrate good times come on!

There's a party goin' on right here  
A celebration to last throughout the years  
So bring your good times, and your laughter too  
We gonna celebrate your party with you

Come on now

Celebration  
Let's all celebrate and have a good time  
Celebration  
We gonna celebrate and have a good time

It's time to come together  
It's up to you, what's your pleasure

Everyone around the world  
Come on!

Yahoo! It's a celebration  
Yahoo!

Celebrate good times, come on!"

Prentiss as just about to continue when someone behind her cleared their throat angrily. Prentiss froze and turned slowly to come face to face with a glowering Strauss.

"Um…hello Ma'am."

"Agent Prentiss." Strauss replied coldly. "I suggest you take your money, and go on lunch break."

"I-I'm sorry Ma'am. I—" Prentiss tried to apologize, ignoring the fact she wasn't sorry in the slightest, but was cut off.

"NOW Agent Prentiss, before I change my mind about not suspending you this instant!"

Prentiss took her money and scurried off, head bowed. As soon as she was outside the building though, she broke into loud laughter. Still chuckling, she got in her car and drove swiftly away.

Little did she know, still inside, Rossi had now found the humor in the situation, and was laughing into his hand. At that moment, Rossi made a decision. He would help these two trouble makers any way he could. They were having fun, and it was nice to have some good memories in this place.

_Good luck_, Rossi thought as he turned to head back up to the bullpen. _You'll need it._

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**Rossi: Hmm...I'm devious. Interesting.**

**Reid: I wanna see what happens next!**

**Me: Don't you know already?**

**Reid: *glares* No. So post this already and start writing!**

**Me: Fine. Please review!**


	8. Tropical Island Sounds

**Yay! An update! Happy Holidays all! Enjoy!****

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******

Chapter Six: Tropical Island Sounds

That afternoon found Reid and Prentiss gathered together, looking through the list.

"I got it!" Prentiss suddenly exclaimed. She pointed to number 12.

"Let's do it to Morgan though! He's been such a grump he could use a laugh!" she stated jovially.

Reid grinned.

"Awesome. We'll have to do it after hours. But how do we both stay behind without it looking suspicious?"

Prentiss frowned and shrugged.

"Just hope it doesn't?"

Reid shrugged as well. Might as well give it a shot.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

The next day after almost everyone had left Reid and Prentiss put their plan into action.

Prentiss quickly extracted a long roll of mosquito netting from her bag and set it up around Morgan's desk. Reid helped her arrange it so Morgan wouldn't be able to look out at the rest of the bullpen.

Then, for grins and to prevent their prank ending too soon, they super glued the netting to the desk.

"Okay, now we just have to figure out some way to set the tape off…" Reid murmured as he secured the last bit of netting in place.

"What about a trigger? If he tries to remove the netting, the tape starts." Prentiss suggested.

"That'd be great but how are we going to set that kind of system up?" Reid wondered aloud

"What about using this?"

Both young agents jumped and whirled around.

"Rossi?"

Rossi grinned. He lifted up the wiring he had in his grasp. He'd gotten it from Garcia's personal stash.

"Hey guys. Need some help?"

Reid stared for a moment before a grin made its way across his face.

"Awesome." He breathed. His eyes were lit up like a child's on Christmas.

Rossi grinned and the group set to work. In under an hour the system was set up, tested, and worked like a dream.

The group said goodbye with promises to meet up later.

Reid and Prentiss left the office first and Rossi left about 20 minutes later.

They met up at a restaurant nearby.

"So Rossi, what made you decide to join in?" Prentiss asked when the older agent arrived.

"I figure you're young, have some fun, as long as it's not dangerous and we don't have a case. Besides, Morgan does need to loosen up some."

The three grinned at one another before ordering and enjoying each other's company.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

The next morning all in the bureau were greeted to an infuriated shout from Agent Derek Morgan.

Morgan had come in at his usual time ready to work only to find his desk completely obscured by mosquito netting.

When he tried to remove the netting it wouldn't budge. Morgan heaved a sigh.

He'd just have to work with the netting around his desk today.

This was as bad as it could get anyway, right?

Wrong.

From speakers hidden somewhere in the bullpen, tropical sounds began to play.

For miles around Morgan's furious scream of 'Reid!' could be heard.

And like a good little prank puller, the man showed up.

"What did you want Morgan? And what's with your desk?"

"I don't know Reid. Why don't you tell me."

"Well," Reid started, walking around the desk slowly. "It seems that someone has super glued mosquito netting to your desk and set up a trigger that if you tried to remove it tropical sounds would play."

"But," Reid contradicted himself. "that may not be the case. It's just what I see."

Morgan was seeing red. He had had a bad week and this was not helping.

Fine. Reid wanted to play jokes? Then he'd certainly humor him.

Morgan took a breath and calmed himself down.

"Looks like it Pretty Boy. Well, I'll just have to deal with whoever did this later. For now I've got stuff to get filed."

With that Morgan turned away from Reid and sat down at his desk.

Reid sidled up to Prentiss and Rossi.

"He's taking this better than I thought." Reid murmured.

"He's got a plan to get back at us. He knows it was us. Or at least that it was you and Prentiss." Rossi replied.

Prentiss just looked on silently.

A few hours later Morgan stood from his desk and walked into JJ's office. JJ looked up in surprise.

"Have you noticed Reid and Prentiss being more irritating than usual?"

JJ frowned.

"Yeah I have." She replied.

"Well I'm going to give them a taste of their own medicine. Want to help?"

The liaison grinned.

Morgan returned the smile. One down, one to go.

Morgan found his way into Garcia's office.

"Baby, wanna do something for me?" Morgan asked the blond tech.

"Anything for you sugar."

Morgan quickly told her of his plan.

"Oh yes I'll help you bad boy! This'll be fun! I'll find a list and email it to you ASAP!"

Morgan grinned and returned to his desk. He started to carefully pull the netting down. After several tedious hours of making sure the glue was off the desk, Morgan found the tape and shut it off.

Reid and Prentiss were going to get it. The lines were drawn, the stage was set.

This meant war.

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**So Morgan's finally on board. Just not with Prentiss, Rossi, and Reid. So I remember thinking this isn't really a war, more just pranks. Well, now that'll change! The next chapter should be up hopefully soon, but no guarentees. Let me know what you thought in a review please!**

**Eminnis**


	9. Author's Note hopefully the last

Hi all! Yeah, I'm posting more author's notes than story..blech. I hate it. But I've just hit a total writer's block the past several months. I'm just now starting to get back into some of my stories. I honestly think I am this time.

But the big question is: Should I continue?

I know it's been ages. So is anyone even interested? Please PM me or review or something to let me know.

Thanks,

Eminnis


	10. What Is That Smell!

**Well I have one thing to say.**

**THANK YOU! **

**When all of those reviews came in I was schocked (and pleased) and it totally inspired me to get this chapter done. For those reading Shelter and Protect, I'm almost done with the next chapter of that one too. I'm thrilled to know you all are enjoying this and thanks so much again. In return I hav decided to give a fairly good long chapter. Over 2,000 words at least. **

**Just a quick note. I have not been watching the current season of Criminal Minds. A friend of mine has and she let me know that Prentiss is gone from the show and JJ. So...this is going to be set officially when they were still on it.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Seven: What Is That Smell?**

_Check your email. *wink wink*_

Morgan grinned as he read the text message from Garcia. Glancing around to make sure no one was watching, he quickly logged into his email. He clicked on the message titled 'Don't let Reid or Prentiss see!'

_Hope this works for you,_ the message read. _Don't let Rossi know either, I think he's in on it_.

Morgan scanned the list and grin got wider.

Photocopy an entire dictionary and fax it to the CFO.

Write a coworker's initials in White-Out on the photocopier.

Schedule a series of important departmental meetings and forget to show up to them.

Send blank sheets of paper via interoffice mail. (Marked "urgent" and "confidential", of course.) Remember to send a few to the mailroom; they'll especially get a kick out of it.

Anonymously post quotes from Adolph Hitler on a company bulletin board. (Quotes about "team spirit" can be particularly inspiring.)

Adulterate other people's lunches: take bites out of sandwiches, sprinkle bacon bits in vegetarians' salads (also works well with Orthodox Jews), and spike the thermos of iced tea with grain alcohol.

See how long you can hide a paper bag full of tuna fish in the back of the refrigerator before someone notices it. (Writing someone else's name on the bag goes without saying.)

Set a mouse free in the office each day. When the problem becomes an epidemic, send snakes after them.

Draw a flip-cartoon of a man running on the bottom of every notepad in the office supply closet.

Hide in the supply closet and scare people when they open the door.

Put a fake rubber hand in your sleeve, and when a secretary walks by, stick the hand in a paper shredder and scream.

When someone is at lunch, use their computer to e-mail a 200 megabyte database file to everyone in the company.

Submit letters of resignation for other employees.

Conduct all correspondence with your friend in the next office via Federal Express early-morning next-day delivery.

Dial the phone number of the guy in the next cubicle whenever he walks away from his desk. Hang up before he can run back to answer it. Repeat often.

Report rumors daily via the bathroom wall.

Pull a fire alarm while someone is in the bathroom.

Make sure your expense report contains at least one reference to the "client meeting" at the "gentleman's club".

Whenever a coworker makes a mistake, offer them the opportunity to "help you out" in exchange for you not reporting the mistake to their boss.

See how many funerals in a row you can get away with leaving work early for.

And finally:

Respond to every request by your boss with the phrase "I would prefer not to."

Morgan got up quickly and walked to JJ's office.

"Garcia got us a list. Let's go. She'll want to talk to us."

JJ nodded and the two quickly made their way down to Garcia's office.

"So what do you think?" Garcia asked as soon as they entered the office.

"Good list. Which one do we start with though?"

"Six, seven, or ten." Morgan stated firmly.

"Well six won't be as fun…how about I do number seven. Morgan, you do ten."

Morgan huffed.

"Why do I have to be the one in the closet?"

"Because JJ is actually needed and I have to go buy a bunch of tuna. I think I'm going to see if Rossi is on it."

"How so?" JJ asked.

"I'm going to make sure I put Rossi's name on the tuna. If he's in on it, he'll want revenge."

"Nice thinking. I'll go hide in a closet then." Morgan pouted.

"Oh don't worry baby, I know for sure Reid goes there at least once a day."

Morgan brightened at that.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

Reid sighed in frustration. He was starting to run out of things to do. He didn't want to stop yet…it was too much fun.

He started down the hall to the supply closet. He needed to get a rag…again. He'd spilt his coffee…again.

He wasn't a klutz…really.

Reid opened the door to the closet and a dark figure lunged at him.

Reid's shriek was embarrassingly girly.

"Morgan!"

Morgan broke out into loud laughter.

"Man you should've seen your face! And I didn't even know your voice could get that high!"

"You—I—what?"

"I figured I'd give you a bit of your own medicine!"

Reid scowled and shoved Morgan away from him. So Morgan thought this was funny huh? Well, he'd turn the tables real quick.

Reid inhaled sharply and exhaled shakily. He moved his shoulders as if he were fighting not to cry.

Morgan frowned at his young coworker.

"Hey. Reid. Man, I didn't mean to scare you so bad."

Reid turned away, hiding his face. He gave a small hitched breath.

"Reid?"

Prentiss! Reid hoped she would catch on to what he was doing quickly.

"Morgan! What did you do to him?"

"I was just playing around!"

Prentiss glared at the dark (in more ways than one) agent before her.

"C'mere Reid."

Reid dutifully shuffled over. He quickly met her eyes, hoping desperately she understood and played along.

Either she didn't understand and seriously thought Morgan had done something, or Prentiss was good at reading minds.

"I can't believe you Morgan! What did you do to him?"

"I jumped out of the closet and acted like I was going to grab him! That's it I swear!"

"That's it? Think of how many times Reid's been kidnapped or assaulted! What do you think he'd think when you leapt out at him?"

"Oh…I didn't think of it that way…and I didn't know it was him there!"

"You shouldn't have been so careless!" Prentiss snapped. She put her arm around Reid's shoulders and led him away.

"I take it you'll explain that to me later?" Prentiss asked softly.

"Yup. Thanks Prentiss. Nice job catching on quick."

Prentiss smirked.

"I can tell when you're really crying Reid. That wasn't what you do when you cry."

Reid shrugged and grinned.

"Well it looks like Morgan has decided to fight back. How are we going to counter?" Prentiss asked.

"I don't know…we're running out of stuff. We need to get whatever thing Morgan is using."

"If he's using a list."

"Morgan could not come up with his own pranks."

"Now that's just mean Reid." Prentiss scolded.

"I'll see if I can hack his computer tonight."

"You can do that?"

Reid smirked.

"Ten bucks says his password is something like 'God's Gift To Women'."

Prentiss laughed.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

Reid didn't break in that night. Or the next night. Or the next. He thought he was getting close though. Morgan had just gone out for lunch, now would be the perfect time to try again.

Reid went to grab his lunch out of the mini fridge. He stopped abruptly as soon as he opened the door.

A horrid smell assaulted his senses.

Wrinkling his nose in distaste, Reid tentatively rooted around in the refrigerator for the source of the vile smell.

Reid finally pulled a bundle out of the refrigerator.

He yelped when he realized what the bundle was wrapped in.

Boxers. Clean ones; thank the heavens, but also Rossi's.

How did he know? The name Rossi was stitched onto the back. Reid stared nervously at the bundle.

Finally he ventured forward and nudged it with his foot. He repeated this motion several times until at last it unrolled.

A soiled brown paper bag sat there innocently.

Reid looked around for some gloves quickly. He spotted a box of dispensable gloves and snapped a pair on quickly.

He knelt down next to the sickening bag. He opened it cautiously.

Tuna.

Days old tuna from the looks of it.

That was it. Reid could never eat lunch here again.

Fighting the urge not to puke, Reid quickly called out.

"ROSSI!"

The older agent walked over to Reid.

"Reid, what is that smell?"

"Gee, I don't know, maybe your days old tuna wrapped inside your _boxers_! Seriously Rossi are you _trying _to scar me for life? Because you're succeeding!"

Rossi frowned.

"How did my boxers get there?"

"I don't know! I don't want to know! I didn't want to know what kind of underwear you wear! But I do now! So let's just forget all about this. Take your stuff!"

Reid held it out expectantly.

Rossi recoiled. When Reid glared at him, he reluctantly took the parcel and dropped it in the trash.

"Reid, I didn't do that. I don't even eat tuna! I don't like it."

Reid shook his head fiercely.

"Well then how did it get there? I mean—"

Reid paused mid rant.

"Morgan."

"What?"

"Morgan. He's been getting 'revenge' on us. I bet he did this."

Rossi glared at the trash.

"Then let's get him back."

"I'm trying to. I'm trying to get his list. I was going to go hack into his computer when I opened up the fridge and…well you know the rest."

"Go do it now! I'll keep a look out."

Reid scurried over to the computer and quickly tried the password he'd thought of: Taking Revenge on Reid and Prentiss Is Fun.

Reid's eyes widened in shock when it worked.

Wow. Just…wow.

Reid quickly got into the emails and opened it up. He grinned. Jackpot. Reid printed it out and gave a thumbs up to Rossi.

They were golden.

* * *

**Yes...the nightmare that is Rossi's boxers...*shudder*. Hope you all enjoyed!**

**I'm starting something new. You all have the lists now, if there's a prank you want a certain team to pull, let me know in and I'll take it into consideration. That's the most difficult thing with me, I'm never sure which prank to do next.**

**Thanks again and please review to let me know!**

**Eminnis**


	11. The Horror!

**I am so very, very, very, very, very (one hundred thousand very's later) very sorry. I tried to update sooner, honestly I did. Finally I've managed to get some of my inspiration back. I hope you all like the chapter and please let me know what you think in a review!**

**Happy Thanksgiving!**

**And since there's not a note at the end, I will sign off now!**

**Eminnis**

* * *

**Chapter Eight: The Horror!**

Reid, Prentiss, and Rossi had decided to go for a few of the longer pranks on their new list. They were all chipping in on the coffee one from their original list and Prentiss decided to try out number fifteen: Dial the phone number of the guy in the next cubicle whenever he walks away from his desk. Hang up before he can run back to answer it. Repeat often.

Rossi left to get the coffee and Prentiss left to set up her prank.

Which left Reid with nothing to do...

Reid abruptly got a devilish grin on his face and he exited the building to make a run to the store.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

Prentiss spotted her victim and smirked. She quickly stepped into the hall and moved into a position where she could still see Morgan as he got ready to leave for lunch.

He finished packing and turned to leave. Prentiss quickly dialed his number and waited.

Morgan frowned as the phone rang. He glared at it harshly, and when that failed to make it spontaneously combust, he resigned himself to answering it. He made his way over to it and was about to pick it up when it abruptly stopped ringing.

Morgan's frown deepened before he shrugged and walked away again. He almost made it to the elevator when he heard it ring again. Biting back a curse, he turned and darted back to grab it.

Again, before he even got there, it stopped.

Morgan glared harshly at the offending object. He was hungry, and a _phone_ of all things was stopping him from getting lunch.

Morgan turned and stalked away but as he got to the stairs it rang again.

"What's up with your phone?" JJ asked as she came into the room.

"I don't know but it's about to find itself in the scrap pile!" Morgan snarled viciously, stomping to his phone for the third time.

JJ cringed as Morgan growled when it once again stopped ringing before he could touch it.

Right, that was it. Morgan was leaving. He did not care anymore about that phone.

He made it to the elevator before it rang again. Morgan stubbornly ignored it and stepped into the elevator without looking back.

Prentiss giggled quietly into her hand.

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~**

Reid made his way to the copy room. A young intern was making some copies and humming quietly to herself. Reid grinned. Perfect.

"Hi Lindsey!" he smiled and she grinned back shyly.

"Hello Doctor Reid. How are you?"

"Good. Just coming to shred some old papers. You?"

"Copying stuff for Strauss."

Reid laughed.

"That sounds fun."

"Eh. It could be better, could be worse."

Reid laughed again before going over to the paper shredder. He slipped the rubber hand down a bit. He started calmly shredding the paper.

Lindsey was about to leave when it happened. A loud scream echoed from behind her and she whirled around.

Doctor Reid was hunched over the shredder. His hand appeared to be caught up in the shredder…and it was being shredded, if the red staining the machine was anything to go by!

Lindsey paled dramatically and let her own piercing scream loose. She screamed again before dropping the papers and fleeing the room.

Reid grinned and straightened up. He hurriedly removed the rubber hand and stuffed it in his bag. He knew he only had a few minutes at most before someone came running. Reid grabbed the napkins and towels from his bag and cleaned away the ketchup staining the machine. He checked to be sure it ran properly before stuffing everything away and calmly continuing his shredding.

A few minutes later Strauss, Hotch, Prentiss, and Rossi all came running.

"Reid! Are you alright?" Hotch demanded, worry coloring his voice.

It almost made Reid feel guilty…almost.

He put on a confused mask and turned to the others.

"Yes…why wouldn't I be?"

"My intern just came running screaming about how your hand was shredded." Strauss stated.

"My hand is fine…" Reid lifted his hand to prove his point. There was a shocked gasp. Lindsey stepped forward.

"But…it was mangled…there was blood. I saw it!"

Reid frowned.

"Are you alright Lindsey? I'm fine…what are you talking about?"

"I—I don't—" Lindsey stammered. Reid continued to look at her oddly.

"Um…never mind. Sorry Madame."

Strauss huffed in annoyance before simply turning and leaving. Hotch gave his team member a stern look, clearing doubting Reid's show of innocence, before he turned and vacated as well. Lindsey followed them out. Prentiss and Rossi stayed.

"I cannot believe you just did that Reid!" Prentiss exclaimed once they were out of earshot. She giggled madly.

Rossi also had a small smile on his face.

"That was good. Cruel, but good."

"It was awesome. You get the coffee Rossi?"

"Yup. It'll be all ready to go tomorrow morning."

"Great. What about you Prentiss?"

Prentiss smiled.

"Stage one is complete, I'll finish it tonight when he tries to leave."

**~ThePrankWarOfTheBAU~ **

Morgan was ready to head home. It'd been a long tiring day of paperwork and he was ready for a nice evening in front of his fireplace. His bags were packed and he was out of here.

He made it to the stairs before his phone rang. Morgan cursed softly and turned back around. He walked quickly to it and made a grab at it just as it stopped. Morgan glared. Not this again…

He left and once again got to the stairs before that insidious ring filled the air. Morgan bit his lip, turned, and moved to his phone once more. It fell silent once more. He turned away, managed the top of the stairs, and it rang.

Morgan turned slowly with flames in his eyes. He stared at the phone for a moment before snapping. He lunged at the phone, grabbing it and throwing it onto the ground.

JJ watched from where she stood with wide eyes as Morgan proceeded to bash it and stomp on it.

Morgan bit his lip, turned, and left the building. JJ frowned thoughtfully, a suspicion growing in her mind. She shook her head before turning to leave as well.

Prentiss and Reid stared in shock at the remains of Morgan's phone.

"I did NOT expect him to take it that badly…" Prentiss murmured.

Reid nodded in avid agreement. Then he smirked, then bit his lip, and finally started to laugh. Prentiss soon joined in.

"He's going to kill us isn't he?" Reid asked as he regained some breathe.

"Absolutely." Prentiss smiled and the two exited the building.


End file.
